Post by soprano54 on May 9, 2007 19:59:01 GMT
Ladies & Gents cast your minds back to June 2000 and the unveiling of the RTR Memorial Statue in Whitehall. I don’t know if many of you know but just after the event the ‘excrement really hit the air-conditioning! RHQ RTR received a phone call from the Accommodation Storeman at Buckingham Palace, wanting to know the whereabouts of the Queen’s chair? Well RHQ then went into one of its well known and documented flaps, then proceeded to issue an edict to both Regiments that the chair must be found at all costs and the perpetrators of this heinous crime be brought to account ASP. They also wanted anyone in the Regiment who had a criminal record to be interrogated – even if they weren’t present at the unveiling, this clearly was going to take a long time for 1 RTR!!! LOL.
After a couple of weeks a tape of the Unveiling and the aftermath, taken from a CCTV was acquired from the ‘Met’ and copies passed around the Regiments and Association Branches. The tape clearly showed a large bloke dressed in a blazer picking up the said chair, which was sat (no pun intended) in the middle of the pavement and putting it on a coach. Very quickly thereafter answers came back from the regiments and Association Branches when they realised the depth of s**t the RTR as a whole were in! The answers went something like this:- 1 RTR – ‘Calm down, calm down, howeverrrrrr its norus! 2 RTR – ‘Facking ell it looks like ‘Basher’ P**ter! 3 RTR – ‘Alroight moi luvver? Well it definitely isn’t ‘Olo’! 4 RTR – ‘Eh dinna kin’!
This clearly didn’t help ‘Auntie John’s’ predicament and he could now see his Knighthood going for a ball of chalk. Then out of the blue, RHQ RTR received a phone call from our very own ‘Bob’ F**ld*r who told them he was in possession of a rather ornate chair that he picked up in London for safe keeping and did they want it back. ‘Does a bear s**t in the woods’ was their reply, ‘Bob’ returned the chair personally within a couple of days.
Talking to ‘Bob’ at a reunion just after the event he told me the parade had finished, everybody was drifting away to various receptions and as he looked around he saw the chair all on its lonesome, so he picked it up and took it home with him. He did say it looked quite good at his dining room table and he had even used it at a bar-b-q, but the thing that concerned him most was that it was stamped underneath ‘Property of HM the Queen’. He had even sat on it on the train from Waterloo to Wool on the journey down to Bovvy, as there were no seats available. All I can say is thank f**k ‘Bob’ found it and not N*ge B**ler, who would have been on that TV programme ‘Flog It’………………again trying to make a fast buck the TTTTTTTTTTWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTT!!!
